Accepting Impermanence In An Anti-Aging Culture

I’m turning 50 in December and while I am quite celebratory planning trips and parties with my friends who are also reaching this milestone, the culture around me is screaming, “Stop getting older! I can help you!" or the messages that are more grounded in reality like, "Let me at least help you slow it down or cover up the evidence on your face!” It strikes me as strange and painful that the thing every one of us on this planet is doing is met with resistance and the insinuation that we could reverse this inevitable occurrence. I’ve even had moments where I am met with shame when I see that, in fact, my body and mind are not impervious to aging, as if I am the one person on the planet who with my will power could fight it off.

As I observe the programming to which we all have been subjected, it seems to be connected to a fear of change. Soygol Rinpoche writes,

In our minds changes always equal loss and suffering. And if they come we try to anesthetize them as far as possible...We assume stubbornly and unquestioningly that permanence provides security and impermanence does not... [However], the realization of impermanence is paradoxically the only thing we can hold onto, perhaps our only lasting possession...what is our life but this dance of transient forms? Isn't everything always changing? The leaves on the trees in the park, the light in the room as you read this...those views and opinions we once held with single-minded passion...the past is past, the future not yet risen, and even the present thought as it has arisen becomes the past. The only thing we really have is nowness, is now.

In order for me to connect to the Now, I must stop the perpetual motion in my day and come into meditation. I breathe in, I breathe out. This moment is here, now it is gone. This moment is all there is. Meditation opens me up to observe I AM within myself and I am simply observing the thoughts of my mind as they arise and then letting them go. I hear people say, "I hate meditating. I can't shut my thoughts down". I respond by agreeing that, in fact, the thinking mind will always have thoughts. That is its job. I have not mastered emptying my mind completely. The practice is to become the observer of our thoughts, not attach to them, and then let them go. We are not our thoughts, we are the one who is having the thought. (Michael Singer Untethered Soul) 

The thought arises, that aging is wrong at some level. I observe myself having that thought and come back to this moment. “At this moment I AM.”  and also, “I'm noticing our culture seems to be obsessed with youth. What am I going to do with that so I can get back to this moment and live the life I have been given?”  That’s it. I don’t have to judge if I feel beautiful or young or old or tired or unattractive. I get to BE. I find my eternal self that has always been here, just a bit covered up in the "identity" I often assume is me. 

I suspect the more I engage in resisting the anti-aging messages of our culture as opposed to resisting aging itself, I will become more peaceful and more present to experience my life to the fullest. It is a revolutionary act though because we have the full force of a culture and industry that is committed to perpetuating this message so we stay locked into the machine that profits by fueling our insecurities and scarcity mindset. I believe the message is not going away any time soon so there is ample opportunity to practice observing and then letting go to move into the thoughts that are more life supporting and kind. 

**Michael SInger
  Link: https://untetheredsoul.com/